the return of the guardian angel with a sense of humor...

Well, somebody out there is finally recognizing what a good sport I've been through all of the lost wallets and cars that have rolled down hills or crashed into grip trucks. Yes, there are stories behind those. My life really is by the book...the physics book, which teaches us that the universe tends toward chaos. Well, nothing's changed in that department. Things are just as random as ever, but they are starting to make more sense. All I know is that SOMEBODY out there has a sense of humor....

Yesterday morning, I went to my amazing friend Sarah Court's yoga class. I was all settled down to start getting into the zen zone, when someone came in late and squealed because she saw her friend. I turned around and then squealed because, it was one of my favorite comediennes from the Office! But, then I squashed the squeal because I realized that the only one squealing had been her, and it certainly wasn't because a hilarious celebrity came in the room. I don't know! Hollywood's tough. I don't want to make people feel uncomfortable or weird, but I do want to give them props if they're awesome. dilemmas, dilemmas.

I usually have no trouble clearing my mind during class, but this time I was all a flutter thinking of what I could possibly say to her after class, coupled with a very zen self-reprimand of, if an encounter is meant to be, it will come to you. Thank you, Sharon Jakubecy, Alexander Technique Guru, for playing the Voice of the Universe in my head :)

Well, after class, as we were passing each other on the way to the pile of yoga blankets, I told her what a fan I was, especially now that I know how hard comedy is after being told by my dad, my latest acting coach, and my favorite acting teaching that I'm really not that funny. Well, I didn't dump all that on her, but that was the motivation. Now, of course, what all those people have in common are that they are authority figures who I admire, and want to please, and who scare all the funny right out of me...but that's a chat for my therapist :)

After class, a guilt-ridden phone call with my mom about money prompted me to print out 20 resumes, and drop them off all up and down Vermont and Hillhurst. I wanted to avoid this with all of my being, and of course, the universe agreed, making me forget several things, causing several trips into the house.

The second to last trip, I forgot my keys, but locked the door from the handle, which rendered me powerless. Luckily, there was one unlocked window in the house, about 1 and a half midgets' heights off the ground. It was right above our dirty, disgusting dish that held every dish in the house I share with 3 other guys. I pushed them out of the way and pulled myself up over the dirty ledge, and into the house, cat-burglar style. On the next trip, I could finally be on my way.

Most places weren't hiring, but were happy to take my resume. I met a couple super hot guys and said to myself, "Well, I will not be working there...but I sure will be eating there more often!"

Figuero is a hipster/euro hotspot. I've found that the Mustard Seed Cafe is a comedian hotspot. The guys that work there Mike and...Bryce?...Pierce?...they're cool, so I can see why funny people want to eat their food. I saw the Indian guy from community and another dude that's on everything, but whose name I forget. Alcove is certainly a little jungle hide-away in the middle of los Feliz.

Public House 1739 was my favorite. I watched the USA-Czech Republic Game on TV, intermittently glancing at the HOT guy who sat down diagonal from me. He was watching me too, but I had to focus on getting the job! I went back twice and for once, the girls were super nice, but when the owner/manager came out, he was scary. I couldn't really understand his accent and couldn't stop starting at his teeth. but, I swallowed the fear and went into Old-Man charm mode, being as cute and adorable as I can, using being in trouble as a teenager as my motivation. Of course, he wanted someone with bar experience, and I had none, but I really was doing a very convincing job of telling him how awesome I am. I was THIS close to getting the job, when some lady walked by with a clipboard, and he abandoned me with a flourish of, "Maybe I'll call you." Ugh, I had turned on all the charm for that dude and he dismissed me like a cheap whore. If I hadn't been so close to tears, I would have gone back to hang out with the cute guy. Trust me, I thought about it.

Luckily, I went to Brian Belleza's yoga class at Blink to Light, he sufficiently strengthened, stretched, and kicked my ass, sending me back into the zen mode with which I had started the day.

Jessica's "Daily Affirmation"

I'm gonna get into my car and drive..

Honestly, I'm not always a hurricane, but when it rains, it pours. These last two days have been eventful. And to think, yesterday morning, I could hardly drag myself out of the house. First, I drove down to Westwood to pick up my fabulous friend Lara from a job interview. The two of us met on our first day at a Boiler-Room-meets-Office-Space Chinese holistic medicine marketing racket. She, wisely, only lasted a few weeks, knowing when to move on...which, truthfully, should have been DAY ONE for both of us. I slogged it out for almost six months...the longest I've ever had a job, actually. It was fun. We were all the same age and it was kind of a party, but all good things must come to an end.

Anyway, after an amazing lunch at the Fresh Corn Grill, Lara and I set out to kill 4 or 5 hours before her flight back to San Jose. So we drove through Hollywood and then Los Feliz and Silverlake, the artsy west-coast cousin to Greenwich Village. Then, we headed down to Long Beach Airport. We said our goodbyes, and then I headed back north to Manhattan Beach to visit with family friends who were expecting me...

Except, they had actually forgotten about me completely and flown to San Francisco

I had already been driving for about 5 hours already and my brain was kind of fried. I could have driven to San Francisco in the amount of time I had spent in the car. But, I didn't know where to go, so I continued to drive aimlessly around Manhattan Beach for a while and then spent some time in Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf. Luckily, thanks to a friend's status on Facebook, I found out Jack Johnson was playing for Free on Santa Monica Pier. I called my awesome friend Lindsay, who I know from kindergarten back in the day in Vienna, VA, and within an hour, we were parked and headed down to the beach bundled in blankets and multiple sweatshirts and armed with a bottle of wine.

We snagged a great seat in front of the giant TV screens, cracked open the wine, made some new friends, and met up with old ones and enjoyed a FREE show, under the lights of the Ferris Wheel and the stars.

It was cold, but we had our wine/beer coats on and we got some great Mexican food @ Cabo Cantina on the Third Street Promenade afterwards.

A long day of insane driving ended on a very good note :)

To market, to market to lose a fat pig?

I've been out of the Hollywood Bubble for a few days now, and my mom considers NPR her white-noise, so I've been forced to face some non-fiction while visiting the nation's capital. It's nice to exercise that part of my brain, although good news is hard to come by out here.

In light of the recent British Petroleum oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico…

My mother got a phone call from her financial advisor yesterday.

He said, “We have to talk. You own stock in BP.”

To add to the melodrama of the moment, the battery on her portable phone died and she didn’t get to finish the conversation. When she tried to call back, he was on another call, probably with another unfortunate BP stock-holder…

My mom said, "Well, we probably should have sold it the day after it happened.."

I just don't know why we all keep playing this game. Good, honest people accepting that thousands of their hard-earned dollars can LITERALLY disappear overnight due to things that are totally out of their control.

How are we all so invested--pun, not intended--in a system that is little more than a glorified, overly legislated and equally loop-holed game of Russian Roulette?

It’s like one, big Vegas table with millions of people gathered around it. Everyone pushing in front, trying to win a buck. Some people just can't handle that kind of pressure, or they just have better things to do, so they decide to hand their cards and chips off to an honest-looking soul who seems to know what he’s doing. They trust that their broker will do his best for them, and sometimes he does, but sometimes he wanders off to check out the free buffet or see Cher or Celine Dion at the Belagio. ("Wouldn't you love to be a business owner without ever having to show up for work?")

For a long time, the system seemed to work. Brokers and Traders got rich by making their clients rich. Everyone was happy…until the Enron Scandal broke through the levee of our sense of security, paving the way for other giants to be exposed as criminals. Wall Street took a nose-dive and crashed and burned into the worst depression and recession since Black Tuesday of 1929…but that's ancient history now, right

Herein lies the problem:

My mother is the quintessential tree-hugger. (Check out her blog: The Durable Human)

She even seems to think trees are acceptable presents on special occasions. She spends her time advocating for green-spaces and sustainable eco-friendly transportation. She has literally turned off her car at red lights to spare the environment an extra few moments free of her exhaust. We would all be biking or roller-skating to work and school if she had her way.

In order to save her energy to save the planet, she delegated the responsibility of managing her stock portfolio to a professional. He often presents her with seemingly profitable stocks that often get a thumbs down because they are not friends of the environment.

She agreed to invest in BP Plc because it has made efforts in the development of solar energy and other alternative fuels.

However, on April 21, 2010, an explosion rocked the Deepwater Horizon Rig, owned by Transocean Limited, on lease to BP Plc unleashing an oil-torrent that continues to flood forth with between 1,000 and 5,000 barrels of oil per day which is going straight into the Gulf of Mexico. All of a sudden, BP is the world's greatest Eco-villain. (BP Oil Spill Timeline)

Today is May 4. It has been almost two weeks since the spill erupted. And she just got the call from her Money Guy today…

The problem? Even though my mom’s financial guy is above-board, honest, and well-intentioned…

No one else can possibly care more about your money than you do!

Brokers and Investment specialists have dozens of clients with their own special needs. With the economy in such a state of flux, it's got to be virtually impossible for them to stay on top of things.

I would love to know how a nation, nay a WORLD of people have collectively agreed that losing huge percentages of what is sometimes a life-time of savings is totally ok!

And if we were to collectively move away from the current economic situation, what would be the solution?

I guess they'd just have to start making coffee cans in Super Jumbo size...